It started off as a simple enough idea: return to the area where my family is from. Tracing my roots is something I have wanted to do since I moved to Germany. I always knew at some point I would go to the town my great-grandfather was from. Beyond going to this place, I didn't know what my "heritage trip" would entail. What would there be to see? Would I simply go to the town and know it was where my great-grandfather once lived? When I first started to plan this portion of our trip, I was afraid that was what our trip would turn in to... us arriving in some small village simply to look around it, snap a few pictures, and then move on. It seemed a bit anticlimactic. I have a huge written family tree/history from my mom's side of the family at my house. I know from the times I have looked through it I do have distant relatives here in Germany. But how on earth do you reach out and make contact? I have the name and an address of a few people... am I simply to write them a letter in English apologizing for my lack of German and introduce myself as some long lost relative who just happens to be living in Germany? It is easy for everyone to encourage me and tell me I should try to find our family - it is always easy to suggest things without actually thinking about the logistics of it. I knew my mom really wanted to try to find family or meet some family when we went to Holtgast. The task of figuring this out fell on me. I honestly didn't have the slightest clue how to start, and I was petrified. Even after living here for three and a half years, I am still scared and embarrassed by the language barrier I experience daily. It is frustrating, scary, and embarrassing to constantly have no idea what is going on, to not be able to participate in conversations, and to not be able to express yourself. It is something which is my own fault - hello Kirsten! Learn some fricken German! But... still... it is a struggle I don't think people quite understand.
I started doing some research about Holtgast in preparation for our trip. I wasn't really sure what I was looking for... I was just hoping I could find something that could point us in the direction of my great-grandpa. Something to make our trip more worth while. As I explained earlier, I had stumbled upon some information about our family which had inadvertently put me in touch with a distant cousin (my great-grandfather's nephew). Prior to leaving on our cruise, Hans and I had emailed back and forth a few times (with the help of Google translate). Hans had invited us to his home providing me with his address and phone number, and stated he would show us around the old family home. The last email I had sent him told him the specific date we were planning to be there. I left on our cruise hoping he had gotten my email.
The morning of "the big day" we were driving from Bremerhaven to Holtgast, about an hour and a half drive (not that it is that far, but you have to drive on a winding highway around the coast) when my phone rang. It was Hans! I made my mom talk to him (she will tell you she doesn't speak German. Yes, her skills are a bit rusty as she doesn't have anyone to practice with... but her German is 100 times better than mine). He was calling to see if we were on our way. I was shocked! He had gotten my email! He was waiting for us! My nerves kicked in at this point. I could only hope we would be able to communicate in some way... my German is limited, and I knew Hans's English is limited.
As we drove into Holtgast I was struck by how small this town is. I knew it was a small town from the research I had done... but this town really truly is tiny. Most German towns have a yellow sign at the city limits which announces the name of the town. Holtgast doesn't even have that. The only reason I knew we were in Holtgast was we drove over a creek which must have the same name, as there was a small green sign which said Holtgast.
We pulled up at Hans's house. A young girl came to the door. She introduced herself as Marie, and explained Hans was her grandfather, making her my cousin. Marie is 18, and is a senior in high school. She was there to meet us, but to also act as a translator. I was grateful and feeling much more comfortable knowing there would be someone to help us talk. Marie and her family live directly next door to Hans. Hans and his wife Hannah were there to welcome us inside of their home, and in true German fashion, they were wonderful hosts. We sat around on the couch and had coffee while all of us chatted. Hans brought out family photos and chatted about the German side of the family. My parents had brought a CD with pictures from our side of the family - they showed each picture to Hans and detailed the name of each person. The first comment they had was what a big family we had... which made me laugh. Yes, yes, we do have a big family. Hans's daughter (Marie's mom) Anna came over to visit as well. There was a strange mix of German and English being spoken, but everyone seemed to understand each other. I remember sitting there on the couch, sipping my coffee, and I couldn't believe how surreal it was. I was in the home of my distant family, and they welcomed me -a perfect stranger - in their home and treated me as if we really were family. It hard to explain, but even though we had just met it felt as if we had been coming to their house for years to visit. Like this was just a regular weekend visit we experienced often instead of a first encounter. I am so thankful my family was so sweet and welcoming - I like to think it is a true family trait and if the roles were reversed my American family would do the same.
After more coffee and snacks, Hans offered to take us to see the old family home. He said it was close enough we could walk, which I was surprised by. We walked a few blocks up the road, and there was the family house. It is an older red brick house with a separate garage. It is located on the main road in Holtgast. There are many houses around this house. Hans explained that all of this area used to be the family farm land, but as the daughters (my great-grandfather's sisters) got married, they would build a house on the family land. So what had once been a farm is now really just a house in a neighborhood. I can't explain the feeling... but there I was. I was in the town my great-grandfather grew up in, and I was looking at the house he grew up in. It was more than I could have hoped for.
The road leading from Hans's house to the family home
What I found most interesting was a memorial to all of the men from Holtgast who has served in the military. There was the official military photo of each person, as well as their dates of service. Some of the people on the memorial had served and were killed, but some had simply served their time. Two people pictured on the memorial were Johann and Diedrich - my great-grandfather's brothers who were both killed in World War II. My grandfather had given my brother a picture of Diedrich many years ago for a family tree school project. Everyone was amazed by how much Diedrich looked like my brother. I would love to see more pictures of Diedrich when he was a bit older to see if he had looked like my brother as he aged...then again, he died very young, so the picture I have below is probably one of the only pictures of him being "older" I will ever see... but as young children my brother and Diedrich looked identical. I was expecting to see the resemblance when I looked at Diedrich's photo, and I did. What I was not expecting was to discover that Johann looked identical to my cousin John. Identical. It was almost creepy in a way. Part of what has delayed this post was I have been trying to find some sort of photo editing program where I could put side by side a picture of Johann and John so everyone could see if for themselves. However, for my family reading this... well, you'll be able to see the resemblance without any aid from me.
Johann is on the left (John), then next to him Dietrich (Kyle)
Talking about family resemblance... I think my cousin Marie looks like a combination of my brother and my cousin Stephanie. Of the female cousins, most of us have dark hair, but Stephanie has always been the only one who is blonde with blue eyes. After meeting Marie, I can see perfectly where Stephanie fits in. I was walking next to Marie, and Josh commented that Marie and I have identical builds. Glad to know I'm not the only long legged one with linebacker shoulders! It is strange to meet people for the first time, yet know just by looking at them that you are related. It is crazy to see how, even across multiple gene pools, family traits.
After our visit to the community center, we walked back to Hans's house. When we arrived back at the house Hannah had prepared lunch for us. As I said, true German hosts. While we were enjoying our homemade soup and bread, it was decided amongst the relatives (in German, so I didn't really catch on until they explained in English) that they would take us for a drive to the coast (about 12 kilometers away). The coastal area around Holtgast is also a popular vacation destination, and I could see why. It was very cute.
When we returned from our trip to the coast, we had coffee and cake (again, with the wonderful German hosts and their open arms). We sat around talking more. By this time it was late afternoon. I couldn't believe we had spent an entire day with my family. At first I had thought we might meet up for a few awkward hours... but this was the furthest thing from that. It was wonderful. It was getting close to dinner time, and Hans daughter Anna had to leave to go to work. It was time for us to leave. We took many family photos, then said our somewhat tearful goodbyes. It felt strange to feel so upset about leaving people you just met, but at the same time it felt perfectly natural.
Hans and his wife Hannah
Mom, Hans, and I
Mom, Hannah, and I
Cousin Marie and I.
Cousin Anna
Tracing my roots turned out to be better than I could have imagined. I have family in Germany! Not only do I have family, but they were so welcoming, and so happy to meet us. Josh and I realize we are in a unique position where we could actually go visit my family again, and have a chance to get to know them. It is something I hope to take advantage of.
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